That's Okay

3 words, I “Something” You, it seems saying these three words is harder than finding that “something”. We all know what that “something” is…Love.
See, that wasn’t so difficult, was it?
I know you don’t love me, that’s okay,
I know you love him, and that’s okay too.
I’ll still chase you like a lovesick puppy.
We’ll have our fun, like we have been.

I love how we can be when we are with each other. And even though it may mean nothing to you, it means the world to me.
I love the way you look at me
I love the way you always smile
I love the way you wrap your arms around me
I love the way your hands find mine even in the dark
I love the way you kiss me, on my lips and on my neck
I love the few mornings I get to wake up beside you
I love the way you let me be myself when I’m with you
I love the way we can plan our fake wedding, covering every detail.
I love everything about you. I won’t lie; I want you to be mine.

It’s never going to happen, but that’s okay.
People think I’m stupid, they try warning me not to get to attached because it could end in heartbreak. That’s true, and probably right, but doesn’t everything end in heartbreak. At the moment I’m happy. Why ruin that?
Sure the day will come that you will move on, but that’s okay.
I think I’m prepared for that, doesn’t mean I’m giving up on you though.
Maybe one day it’ll happen, but if it doesn’t, that’s okay.
One day you might hear me say those 3 words, you might run, you might not and maybe you might just say them back; I don’t know, but that’s okay.
I’m happy now, thanks to you.
People don’t approve of us, but as long as I have you, I’ll be okay.

Complete and utter rambling...

I don’t ever remember not being in a confused state of mind.
I don’t ever remember having a clear head.
There has always been something bothering me.
There has also been something to tear apart my soul and ruin my day.
Some things are just in my head.
Some things are really there.
Determining what is there and what is in my head seems to be the hardest thing.

I don’t know if I’ve ever really been in love
I don’t know if I’ve ever really been loved.
What is love?
What isn’t love?
Can it be defined as a single feeling?
Or is it simply to complex to understand?

Have I ever been okay?
Have I ever been Happy?
I don’t know what I want.
But I know that I want it.

You can never hurt me as much as I hurt myself….