Friday, March 26, 2010

Complete and utter rambling...

I don’t ever remember not being in a confused state of mind.
I don’t ever remember having a clear head.
There has always been something bothering me.
There has also been something to tear apart my soul and ruin my day.
Some things are just in my head.
Some things are really there.
Determining what is there and what is in my head seems to be the hardest thing.

I don’t know if I’ve ever really been in love
I don’t know if I’ve ever really been loved.
What is love?
What isn’t love?
Can it be defined as a single feeling?
Or is it simply to complex to understand?

Have I ever been okay?
Have I ever been Happy?
I don’t know what I want.
But I know that I want it.

You can never hurt me as much as I hurt myself….

3 comments:

  1. "Can it be defined as a single feeling? Or is it simply to complex to understand"

    I feel for you. I've been there. To not know what you feel or how to get rid of the pain of memories you can't forget.... you want to forget but it just seem like it doesn't want to get out of your head. It's hard I know. There is a constant reminder everywhere sometimes...

    I love your blog it is very personal and intense!! Keep writing and we'll try to make you feel better with our comments.

    You should enjoy your weekend!! :)

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  2. Those are some really tough questions. I think we all ask ourselves that sometimes, and always give up trying to figure them out until we feel them.

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  3. This really spoke to me. I feel this way often. There are many times I wonder what is in my head and what is real, this is probably why I ramble so much. The last line of this was my favorite though, although I loved it all. "You can never hurt me as much as I hurt myself…." Isn't that the truth.

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